Narrative Writing (Paper 2): Examiner Report 1

Narrative writing

3 (a) Write a story with the title, ‘Under suspicion’.

OR

3 (b) Write a story that begins with an important announcement.

 

Narrative writing was the choice of almost two thirds of the candidature, with Question 3(b) being much more popular than Question 3(a). Marks across the range were awarded to responses to both questions.

Examiners were able to award marks at the top of Band 7 in a number of cases, but at all levels of achievement engagement with the tasks was evident, with both titles producing some lively and often intriguing narratives. Responses to both titles often included interesting descriptive detail which enhanced the narratives. The difficulty of creating satisfactory conclusions to the stories was noted, underlining the need to have the end of the story in mind in the process of writing it.

 

There was a wide range of interpretations of the title, with stories covering almost any kind of criminal or immoral behaviour though sometimes it was difficult for the examiner to see the connection with the title. There were many action-packed narratives of crime-solving or military action. Frequently these were not awarded marks in the higher Bands for Content and Structure, largely because they were packed too densely with incident and action, and lacked the desirable qualities of characterisation and setting.

 

Somewhat more successful were those in the ‘whodunnit’ genre, although the working out of clues and suspects poses great challenges for timed writing and led to some partially credible conclusions. The most effective responses were those involving a limited number of characters and plot developments.

 

A well-constructed narrative awarded a mark in Band 6 had a neat twist in the conclusion; a young woman is tempted by a large payment to accommodate someone for a week in her flat. His strange appearance and behaviour make her increasingly anxious, and tension grows until he grabs her from her bed in an apparent abduction. In fact he was saving her from an intruder. Narratives were often more successful when set in familiar, credible circumstances.

 

Other responses similarly closely focused in time and space and employing a few well-drawn characters and spare but effective dialogue were awarded marks in Band 7 and at the top of Band 6.

 

Responses to Question 3(a) awarded marks at the lower end of Band 6 and in Band 5 often had interesting features but lacked the assurance and ability to engage the reader of those given higher marks or had less convincing plotlines. There were many high-speed stories in which teenage protagonists brought down criminal gangs. These often ended with an undeveloped list of explanations. In the middle range there were often stories with interesting concepts and engaging characters but they were frequently marred by unconvincing endings.

 

Responses at the lower end of Band 5 and below were sometimes unrealistic tales of crime, horror or war or undistinguished series of events. Typical of many event-driven responses was an imbalance in their constituent parts, with the crucial suspicion or its resolution occurring abruptly and often in a final, short paragraph.

 

The second narrative question was the most popular of the composition choices and elicited many effective narratives and a wide range of subject material. At all levels of achievement there were many announcements of engagement, marriage or pregnancy. These often enabled interesting presentations of domestic disharmony with effective characterisation which engaged the reader. ‘Important announcements’

also frequently concerned military coups, the imposition of martial law, imminent disaster such as tsunamis or some sort of global apocalypse. These narratives often attempted to engage the reader in exciting and

dramatic scenarios but were packed with major events which were difficult to manage in the time available. Inevitably in such responses there was little time to develop characterisation or setting.

 

Responses often successfully employed a flashback technique after a strong beginning featuring the announcement. One very effective Band 7 response told a harrowing and well-plotted story: ‘‘‘Warning,

warning!’ the robotic voice wailed. ‘The risk factor of plague XLC-38 has reached emergency levels. All healthy citizens must retreat to plague bunkers; all medical staff must report to their recovery centres

immediately.”’ The narrative engaged the reader most effectively by the personal story of the protagonist, an aid worker who finds her own mother in extremis and cannot save her or herself. This was a good example of the use of close personal focus to anchor the narrative. Some strong narratives had a sustained build-up of interest and a well-managed twist.

 

Responses awarded marks at the lower end of Band 6 and in Band 5 were mostly quite realistic. At this level there were many announcements of pregnancy or engagement, received by family and friends in various ways. The more engaging narratives grew from hostile or dismayed reactions to the announcement: one response detailed the mostly happy reactions of the narrator’s family members but for the shock expressed by the family matriarch, a well-drawn character, because the couple were not yet married. It concluded, ‘Phew! If she carries on like that now, what would she say if she finds out the baby’s not Sean’s?’

 

In Band 5 and below many similar stories consisted of little more than the announcement, the delight of the family, the wedding or birth, and some conclusion. Occasionally tragedy intervened; the fiancé was killed or the baby died. Responses at this level also frequently lacked effective character development or convincing setting detail.

 

In Band 4 and below, responses were sometimes simple chronological accounts of events, some less effective responses resembling diary entries rather than developed narratives. These were given marks for

Content and Structure in Band 4 or below.

 

Responses below Band 3 were usually simple series of events undifferentiated in importance and were often packed with unlikely combinations of events and characters. The weakest responses were usually very brief, offering little to engage the reader.

 

Style and Accuracy

Examiners were able to award high marks for style and accuracy to many candidates whose vocabulary and sentence structures were varied and effective, and whose writing was free of repeated error. In the higher Bands, syntax, sentence structure and clausal position were often manipulated for effect, especially in the creation of narrative tension. In this genre, any inability to punctuate and paragraph dialogue properly was exposed, and sometimes proved a pitfall for otherwise fluent and accurate writers. The use of dashes rather than inverted commas to punctuate dialogue was seen at various levels of achievement. In the middle band, where there were a few basic errors of spelling and punctuation and plain, unvaried, vocabulary, the examiners could award a mark of seven or eight: conversely, clear and accurate sentence structure and straightforward paragraphing could compensate for a lower mark for Content and Structure.

 

Marks in Band 4 were given when writing was marred by misuse of commas, weak punctuation, and faults in tense control and agreement. Confusion or inconsistency in the use of gender pronouns was seen quite often. The misuse or omission of capital letters inevitably reduced the marks given for otherwise sound writing. Occasionally only a mark in Band 5 could be awarded because serious errors in sentence structure and syntax impeded communication.

 

Taken from:

Cambridge International General Certificate of Secondary Education

0500 First Language English (Oral Endorsement) November 2019

Principal Examiner Report for Teachers

© 2019